Support for parents and carers holding things together 

The first appointment is a chance for us to get to know you and your child, and for you to get a sense of whether TMH feels like the right place for them.

We’ll talk a little about what has brought you to us, what your child may be struggling with and anything else you think it would be helpful for us to know. We’ll also explain how therapy works – including confidentiality and its limits – and answer any questions you or your child have.

We’re not there to judge, diagnose or make assumptions. At this stage, we simply want to start to explore what might be happening and whether we’re the right people to help.

There are lots of different types of therapy such as cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), person centred, integrative, humanistic, psychodynamic and many others.

Many of our therapists are psychodynamically trained, which means they’re interested not only in what is happening in a young person’s life now, but also in the experiences, relationships and patterns that may be influencing how they think, feel and respond.

Rather than expecting a young person to fit a particular type of therapy, we think carefully about the individual in front of us and how best to work with them.

It’s very common for parents and carers to ask themselves this, particularly when you know your child’s struggling.

But a young person needing therapy doesn’t automatically mean somebody has done something wrong. There can be many reasons why children and teenagers find things difficult – often there isn’t one simple cause.

But therapy isn’t about looking for someone to blame. Far from it: finding support when your child’s struggling shows you care.

There isn’t a set number.

Every young person is different, and some need more time than others to build trust, begin talking about what is happening and make sense of difficult experiences.

We won’t rush your child or expect them to make progress to a timetable. The most important thing is that the therapy continues to benefit your child, and makes a lasting difference.

We ask for some basic information before therapy begins so we have the details we need to safely care for your child, including who to contact if there’s an emergency.

Providing someone’s details doesn’t mean we’ll routinely contact them. We’ll explain when information might need to be shared and will always respect the confidentiality arrangements agreed with you and your child.

This is entirely up to you. We won’t contact their school without your permission.

We’ll email you an invoice after each session, and you can pay by cash, card or bank transfer.

Payment is due within 24 hours of the session.

Yes. TMH is a weekly service and your child’s regular appointment time is reserved for them, so missed or cancelled sessions are still charged.

You can find full details in our terms and conditions.

We don’t have direct arrangements with medical insurance providers. However, we provide an invoice for every session and some insurers may reimburse the cost.

It’s worth checking directly with your provider to see what your policy covers.

Yes. Therapy at TMH usually takes place at the same time each week.

That regularity is an important part of the work, helping your child build a relationship with their therapist and giving sessions a sense of continuity. We understand that holidays and other commitments happen, but wherever possible we encourage families to keep interruptions to a minimum.

No. All we ask is that you return your completed information form and signed confidentiality policy before we start the first session.

No. One parent or carer can bring your child.

For the first few sessions, we may recommend that you stay on the premises while your child is with their therapist. Therapy is a new experience and, particularly for younger children, it can be reassuring to know that someone they know well is nearby.

Whatever helps them feel comfortable is usually fine.

That might be a favourite toy, comfort item, drawing kit or something else that helps them settle. We’d rather they didn’t bring strongly smelling food, simply because the smell tends to hang around.

You’re very welcome to come in at the beginning if your child needs some help settling.

In most cases, therapy works best once the young person has some private space with their therapist. We’ll never forcibly separate a child from a parent or carer, but once they seem comfortable, we’ll usually encourage you to leave the room and let the session become theirs.

Sometimes a session involves a lot of playing and drawing – but it isn’t just about playing and drawing.

Children don’t always communicate what they’re experiencing in life through conversation in the way adults might. Play, games, stories and creativity can give them other ways to express themselves and start making sense of thoughts and emotions they may not yet have the words for.

Our therapists are trained to work with these different ways of communicating.

Young people come to us for many different reasons. They might be reluctant to go to school, feel tearful, anxious, angry or have angry outbursts.

They may be struggling with school, friendships, family relationships, confidence or emotions that seem overwhelming. And sometimes their behaviour changes without anyone being quite sure why.

Rather than treating the behaviour as the whole problem, we begin by getting to know the young person and gradually exploring what may be happening underneath it.

Your child’s therapy is confidential, so their therapist won’t give you a running account of what they say in sessions.

That doesn’t mean you’re completely shut out. We can talk with you about how the therapy is progressing and, where appropriate, broader themes that may help you understand and support your child.

If something important needs to be shared with you, the therapist will often help your child think about how they might tell you themselves.

However, confidentiality does have limits. If we believe a young person or somebody else may be at serious risk of harm, we may take action to help keep them safe. Wherever possible, we will talk with the young person about what needs to happen and why.

Whatever your child talks about in therapy is treated as confidential and isn’t routinely shared with schools or other organisations.

Our therapists do have regular professional supervision with colleagues across TMH. The aim is to continually develop best practices, so they discuss cases in broad terms, without using names or identifying details.

Confidentiality means a young person can trust that sessions are private spaces where they can talk openly without expecting anything reported back to parents, carers or other people in their life.

That trust is an important part of therapy, which is why we’re clear from the beginning about the circumstances in which confidentiality may need to be limited.

Yes, absolutely. We just ask that longer conversations don’t happen immediately before or after your child’s session. Those few minutes belong to the young person and seeing their parent and therapist having a private conversation can sometimes leave them wondering if information from the session is being passed on.

If you’d like to talk, contact reception and we can arrange a separate conversation with the therapist.

Yes, although therapists aren’t always able to respond immediately.

Your child’s therapist may give you an email address or other contact details so that you can get in touch when necessary. If something needs a quicker response during our opening hours, it’s usually best to contact the reception or clinical team.

Our phone and email are also monitored outside normal hours on a best-efforts basis, but TMH isn’t a 24-hour crisis service. If there is an immediate concern about someone’s safety, don’t wait for a response from us: contact urgent or emergency support.

One of the most helpful things you can do is give them some space.

Try not to question them about what they talked about or ask for a detailed account of the session. A simple “How did it go?” gives them the choice to tell you more if they want to.

It’s also best not to send them into therapy with a list of things they need to discuss. Sessions work more naturally when the young person and therapist have room to explore whatever emerges.

It’s usually best to talk to your child first, because there isn’t one right answer. Some young people are completely comfortable with brothers, sisters, grandparents or other relatives knowing. Others would rather keep therapy private.

We can help you think about what to say, who needs to know and how your child might feel about it. We also have a support group for parents and carers which is a good place to talk this through.

We’d suggest being thoughtful about how you talk about the cost in front of your child.

If a young person repeatedly hears that therapy is expensive, they can sometimes begin to worry that they’re a burden or that they need to ‘get better’ quickly to justify the money being spent. Therapy shouldn’t feel like something they need to complete on a deadline.

Yes. The relationship between a young person and their therapist matters enormously, and occasionally the pairing simply isn’t right. We put a lot of thought into matching young people with therapists, but no relationship can be predicted perfectly.

If your child wants to change, we’ll take that seriously. We may also want to understand what’s prompted the request. Sometimes the pairing genuinely isn’t right; at other times, wanting to change therapist can happen when the work has touched on something particularly difficult.

Where possible, we’d usually encourage giving the relationship a little time before making a decision. If a change is still the right thing to do, there are no hard feelings.

There isn’t a fixed point at which therapy has to finish.

Over time, you or your child may begin noticing changes in how they cope, understand themselves or manage the things that brought them to therapy. Progress isn’t always smooth or immediately obvious, and sometimes therapy can bring difficult thoughts or emotions closer to the surface before they become easier to understand.

During sessions, the therapist might talk to your child about how they think they’re doing and, based on their response, decide on how and when to end therapy. We’ll never continue therapy if we don’t believe it’s helping your child.

To formally end the service, the young person or their parent or carer can simply email the therapist or reception team. The final session is already prepaid so, where possible, we like therapy to have a planned ending rather than simply stopping without the chance to say goodbye.

The therapist, young person and family can think together about when the time is right and what would make the ending helpful.

If a young person decides that they no longer want to continue, we always respect that. We strongly encourage a final session where possible because endings themselves can be an important part of therapy, but we won’t force somebody to attend.

Looking after your own wellbeing can make it easier to remain calm, available and supportive when your child needs you – not least because supporting a child who is struggling can take a lot out of you.

Try to protect some time for sleep, food, rest, friends or anything else that helps you recharge. If you’re struggling yourself, we offer sessions for parents and carers.

No. Some families come to us with an existing diagnosis or while they’re going through an assessment process. Others simply know that something isn’t right or that their child’s struggling.

If we think another assessment or professional service could also be helpful, we’ll talk that through with you. But ultimately, therapy gives us space to understand what’s happening without needing to begin with a label.

You don’t need to know before you contact us.

There are many different therapeutic approaches and what helps one young person may not be right for another.

Our initial assessment helps us get a first understanding of your child’s experiences, individual needs and what they might be struggling with. From there, we can think about a way of working that may suit them best.

It’s understandable to find these terms confusing.

Counselling and psychotherapy are both forms of talking therapy that can help people explore emotions, relationships, experiences and patterns in their lives. The way individual therapists deliver support here can vary considerably.

Psychology is a broader field concerned with understanding the mind and behaviour. Clinical psychologists can assess psychological difficulties and provide psychological therapies.

Psychiatry is a medical speciality: psychiatrists are doctors who can assess and diagnose mental health conditions, prescribe medication and also use psychological approaches

At TMH, our work is therapeutic rather than diagnostic. We’ll always be clear about the qualifications of the therapist working with you and what they’re trained to provide.

Working with children and teenagers requires specialist knowledge and experience. It isn’t simply a case of providing adult therapy to somebody younger: young people develop, communicate and understand their experiences differently.

At TMH, our therapists work within the age groups and areas they are appropriately trained for – and are qualified to Master’s level within their therapeutic specialisms.

It can be.

Adults often imagine therapy as two people sitting in a room talking, but children and teenagers don’t always communicate best that way.

Depending on their age and personality, a session might involve conversation, play, drawing, games, creativity or simply time spent getting comfortable with the therapist.

The therapy should adapt to the young person, rather than expecting the young person to adapt to therapy.

Absolutely. You don’t need to arrive with an explanation, diagnosis or even a clear idea of what’s changed.

Parents often contact us because their child seems more anxious, angry, unhappy, withdrawn or simply not quite themselves. Therapy involves being curious about what a child is experiencing, and finding ways to move forward.

Yes. We’re not here to treat or change neurodivergence. But neurodivergent young people can experience anxiety, relationship difficulties, questions around identity and many of the other struggles that bring anyone to therapy.

And we always adapt the way we work around a young person’s communication, sensory and individual needs so they can engage in a way that works for them.

That doesn’t necessarily mean you’re wrong to be concerned – or that your child is wrong either.

Parents and young people sometimes experience the same situation very differently. Your child may genuinely not see something as a problem, or they may find it difficult to understand or explain what’s happening.

We’ll listen to everyone’s perspectives and consider whether therapy is something the young person can engage with and benefit from.

They don’t need to be able to. Some children and teenagers can explain what they struggle with. Others communicate much more naturally through behaviour, play, drawing, creativity or activity.

We start our therapy wherever they feel most comfortable. Then, over time, the therapist can help them make sense of their experiences and develop the words to understand and communicate what’s happening.

No. Past experiences and relationships sometimes help us understand what’s happening now. But therapy isn’t about endlessly searching the past for a cause.

There’s plenty of focus on what’s happening in a young person’s life today – their relationships, worries, emotions, experiences and whatever emerges naturally during sessions. How much attention each area gets during a session depends entirely on the individual.

It’s important to talk about it. Change in therapy isn’t always obvious from the outside and doesn’t necessarily follow a smooth upward curve. Sometimes what a young person learns about themselves in therapy only becomes useful or noticeable later.

Equally, therapy shouldn’t simply continue indefinitely without question. If you or your child are concerned that it isn’t helping, let us know immediately: a different approach may be useful or another therapist or service may be a better fit.

They have different purposes. A diagnostic assessment looks at whether someone meets the criteria for a particular condition. Therapy is less about deciding which label fits and more about understanding the individual young person – their emotions, relationships, experiences and struggles.

A diagnosis can still be useful information and may inform the way we work, but we don’t need one before we can begin helping someone explore what is happening. If we think a further assessment might be useful, we’ll talk it through with you.

Therapy can help with a very wide range of struggles, but it isn’t always the only or most appropriate support.

Sometimes a young person needs medical care, psychiatric assessment, specialist support, practical help or another service either alongside or instead of therapy.

That’s one reason our initial assessment matters. It gives us a chance to honestly consider whether TMH is the right place for your child.

If we don’t think so, we’ll help you understand what other support may be more appropriate.

Therapy works best when a young person has at least some willingness to take part. Sometimes a reluctance is really around an uncertainty or anxiety about what therapy will be like. Meeting us can take away some of that uncertainty.

We never want somebody to feel dragged into therapy. So if your child really isn’t ready to attend, we can also work with parents or carers. Supporting the adults around a young person can make a meaningful difference at home while leaving the door open for them to consider their own therapy later.

Yes, in many circumstances a young person may see their GP, CAMHS, a psychiatrist or another service while having therapy with us.

If it’s useful – and with the necessary consent – we can also coordinate with other professionals involved in their care to help make sure the different kinds of support fit together.

However, it wouldn’t be appropriate for a young person to receive the same or very similar therapy from two therapists at once.

Yes. Medication and therapy play different roles. One doesn’t automatically rule out the other, and many young people have therapy while taking prescribed medication.

We do ask to be kept informed about any medication a young person’s taking, and any changes to it, as these can sometimes affect how they’re feeling.

Importantly, TMH therapists don’t prescribe or advise on medication.

Please let us know if something significant happens that you think the therapist needs to be aware of.

Contact the therapist or our clinical team, and we’ll make sure the information reaches the right person.

Please note that this doesn’t mean the therapist will automatically bring it up with your child: they’ll decide how relevant the information is to the therapy and the best way to handle it – while continuing to respect your child’s confidentiality.

Yes, if it’s helpful and when the appropriate consent has been given.

Sometimes a conversation with a school can help its staff understand what a young person needs or how they could support them. That doesn’t mean we’ll tell the school what your child talks about in therapy. Their sessions will remain confidential and we’ll think carefully about what information actually needs to be shared.

Yes. Sometimes parents and carers need space to think about what’s happening too – both for their child and for themselves.

Our clinical team can help you think about what would be most useful. It might be an occasional phone call or 30-minute consultation, or there may be times when we recommend more regular therapeutic support for one or both parents or carers.

Their therapy doesn’t suddenly have to stop. If the relationship is helpful and the young person wants to continue, therapy can certainly carry on into adulthood.

What does change is who makes decisions about the therapy and who we’re able to communicate with. And we’ll talk through those changes as the young person approaches adulthood, so everyone knows what to expect.

Please tell us. Thoughts of self-harm or suicide don’t automatically mean that a young person can’t have therapy, and it’s important that they have somewhere they can talk openly about what they’re experiencing.

Our therapists will consider safety and risk alongside the therapeutic work. If we believe there’s an immediate or significant risk of harm, additional or urgent support may be needed and we may need to take steps to help keep the young person safe.