Exercise and mental health: how moving helps, and when it stops helping What movement does for your mind, how to find something you'll stick with, and how to notice when exercise has stopped being good for you. Find out more
Bullying at school, online and at home: a guide for parents, carers and young people Where bullying shows up — including the quiet kinds at home and online — why some children do it, and what both adults and young people can do about it. Find out more
Adolescent rebellion: growth and development Adolescence is a turbulent time for many families. As children transition into teenagers, they often engage in behaviours that challenge. Find out more
About therapy Providing young people a safe, confidential space to talk about what’s going on, Learn more
Types of therapy Our therapists use different approaches adapting the way they work for each young person. Find out more
Meet the TMH team Our team brings together BACP-accredited therapists and mental health professionals Find out more
Exercise and mental health: how moving helps, and when it stops helping What movement does for your mind, how to find something you'll stick with, and how to notice when exercise has stopped being good for you. Find out more
Bullying at school, online and at home: a guide for parents, carers and young people Where bullying shows up — including the quiet kinds at home and online — why some children do it, and what both adults and young people can do about it. Find out more
Adolescent rebellion: growth and development Adolescence is a turbulent time for many families. As children transition into teenagers, they often engage in behaviours that challenge. Find out more
About therapy Providing young people a safe, confidential space to talk about what’s going on, Learn more
Types of therapy Our therapists use different approaches adapting the way they work for each young person. Find out more
Meet the TMH team Our team brings together BACP-accredited therapists and mental health professionals Find out more
At a glance Bullying is not a normal or harmless part of growing up. It can have a serious impact on a teenager’s mental health.Bullying can be physical, verbal, relational1, online or happen at home.Adolescence is a sensitive time when young people form their identity, and repeated humiliation, exclusion or intimidation can be especially damaging.Teenagers who are being bullied need calm support, validation and practical help.If your child’s bullying others, they need clear boundaries, accountability and support to change the behaviour.Early intervention can reduce harm, protect mental health and help prevent patterns from becoming entrenched. Bullying has a greater impact on adolescents Bullying is more than unkindness. It’s repeated behaviour that causes harm, distress or fear, and often involves a power imbalance. For teenagers, that harm can cut especially deep.It’s not always obvious. Physical bullying can be visible. But other forms, such as verbal, social or relational bullying1, can be subtle, cumulative and easy to dismiss.Adolescence is a time of rapid emotional, social and psychological development. Teenagers are working out who they are, where they belong and how they’re seen by others. Friendships, peer approval and social status can feel intensely important.When bullying happens at this stage of life, it can affect far more than a young person’s feelings. It can alter their sense of safety, damage self-esteem and begin to shape how they feel about themselves and their relationships with everyone – not just the people involved.For some teenagers, bullying leads to fear and hypervigilance2. For others, it leads to shame, withdrawal, anger or hopelessness. Often, adults only see part of the picture.The different forms bullying can takePhysical bullying | This is often easier for adults to identify because there may be visible injuries, damaged possessions or direct reports of violence. But the emotional impact can last long after an incident has ended.When a young person feels physically unsafe, the brain’s threat system becomes highly active. Stress hormones such as cortisol3 and adrenaline rise, and the body prepares for danger. If this happens repeatedly, a teenager may begin to feel on edge even in situations that seem safe to others. Over time, this can affect sleep, concentration and their ability to settle.Physical bullying can include:Hitting, pushing or kickingPhysical intimidationDamaging belongingsBlocking someone’s movement or cornering themVerbal bullying | Sometimes minimised as banter, teenagers are especially sensitive to hurtful words that are repeated over time. They can begin to feel true, particularly when they focus on something a young person is already unsure about. The emotional pain can be profound.Verbal bullying can include:Name-callingInsults about appearance, identity or abilityThreatsSpreading rumoursRepeated ‘jokes’ aimed at the same personRelational bullying | This can be particularly painful in adolescence because belonging is so central to development. Teenagers are often highly attuned to whether they’re included, valued or left out.Being excluded can activate intense anxiety and shame. A young person may start to monitor every interaction, overthink social situations, and withdraw in an effort to protect themselves. This can create a painful cycle in which isolation deepens the emotional impact of the bullying.Social or relational bullying can include:Deliberate exclusionPublic humiliationTurning someone’s peers against themWithdrawing friendship as a form of controlSilent treatment used to punish or dominateCyberbullying | Bullying in a digital space can feel relentless because it follows a young person beyond school or college. It removes the sense of safety that home might once have provided after the school day ends.In turn, online content can spread quickly to a wide audience, which intensifies shame and panic. For some teenagers, there’s also the constant fear of not knowing who has seen something, shared something or commented behind their back.This can be especially upsetting when it continues into the evening or night. Sleep may suffer, and without rest, emotional resilience is often lower the next day.Cyberbullying can include:Hurtful or threatening messagesSharing embarrassing images or videosImpersonating someone onlinePublic shamingExcluding someone from group chats or online communitiesBullying at home | Home should be a place of safety. But sometimes bullying can happen within families, where harmful behaviour is normalised as teasing or dismissed as ordinary sibling dynamics. What matters is the pattern. If the behaviour is repeated, one-sided and distressing, it should be taken seriously – the emotional impact can be especially confusing and painful.Bullying at home can include:Sibling intimidationRepeated put-downs or one-sided ‘jokes’Ongoing humiliationControlling or threatening behaviourHow bullying can affect mental healthBullying can affect both short-term wellbeing and longer-term mental health. Some young people become quiet and shut down. Others become more reactive, defiant or emotionally volatile. A teenager who seems ‘difficult’ may in fact be overwhelmed, ashamed or frightened.In the short-term, a teenager may show:AnxietyLow moodIrritabilitySleep disruptionSchool avoidanceWithdrawal from friends or familyTearfulness or angerChanges in eating or confidenceLonger-term effects can include:DepressionPersistent low self-esteemSocial anxietyTrust difficultiesOngoing hypervigilanceSelf-harmSuicidal thoughtsBullying can also affect learning. A young person who feels unsafe or is constantly on edge may struggle to concentrate, retain information or feel motivated in school. In some cases, they may begin to avoid school altogether.None of this means the damage is permanent. With support, protection and time, recovery is absolutely possible. But early intervention can speed up the process.Signs a teenager may be being bulliedTeenagers don’t always tell adults directly when bullying is happening. Shame, fear of retaliation, or worry that things will be made worse can stop them from speaking up. Signs to look for include:Not wanting to go to school or collegeFrequent headaches, stomach aches or vague illnessesChanges in sleepWithdrawing from usual friendships or activitiesSudden distress after using a phone or computerLost or damaged belongingsChanges in mood, confidence or appetiteBecoming unusually quiet, angry or secretiveNone of these signs prove bullying on their own. Look for patterns or dramatic changes in behaviour.What young people themselves can doTeenagers are not powerless. When bystanders refuse to participate, bullying often loses some of its power. Helpful steps young people can take include:Telling a trusted adult earlyStaying near supportive peersNot joining in when others are being targetedSaving evidence of online bullyingSupporting others who are excludedUsing privacy, blocking and reporting tools onlineSeeking help before things escalateThe role of schools and other servicesSchools have a duty of care to safeguard pupils and respond to bullying.Safeguarding or legal actions may be required when bullying involves threats, harassment, hate incidents, stalking or image-based abuse.Be sure to read the school’s anti-bullying policy. If you’re concerned, contact the form tutor, head of year, pastoral lead or safeguarding lead. Request a clear action plan and keep written records of incidents and responses – they can strengthen your case and reduce confusion. Always follow up if the issue doesn’t improve. What to do if your child is being bullied If your teenager tells you they’re being bullied, the way you respond can make a significant difference.Stay calm, listen and take them seriously | A calm response creates emotional safety. Your child may feel exposed, ashamed or frightened. If you respond with panic, anger or immediate action before they’re ready, they may stop confiding in you. Steadiness can help their nervous system6 begin to settle, and also supports co-regulation.Thank them for telling youListen without interruptingValidate what they’re feelingReassure them that it’s not their faultAvoid rushing straight into problem-solvingMake a plan together | Reporting bullying is not about revenge – it’s about safety, support and accountability. However, teenagers often fear losing control of the situation. It can help to involve them in deciding what happens next.Identify a trusted adult in schoolContact a teacher, tutor, pastoral lead or safeguarding leadKeep a written record of incidentsSave screenshots or messagesThink about where and when bullying tends to happenStrengthen support around them | Bullying can make a young person feel isolated, so it’s important to widen the circle of support where possible. Even one reliable relationship can help buffer the impact of bullying. Teenagers recover better when they feel seen, believed and supported.Encourage time with safe friendsSupport activities outside the bullying contextReduce unhelpful online exposureHelp them take action without expecting them to handle it alone | Teenagers often need help rebuilding their confidence and sense of control after bullying. The goal is not to make them solely responsible for stopping the bullying – but it often helps if they feel less powerless within a situation.Practise what they might say in certain situationsCreate a buddy system7Encourage confident, non-provocative body languageHelp them identify safe exits and supportive adultsReinforce that asking for help is a strength, not a weaknessReview online safety | Online harm can feel especially exposing because of the speed, scale and permanence of digital content. Adults may need to take a more active role here.Review privacy settingsBlock and report abusive usersScreenshot harmful contentLimit late-night device use where possibleAvoid engagement with abusive messages What to do if your child is bullying others Discovering that your child has bullied someone else can be deeply uncomfortable. It may bring up defensiveness, disbelief, shame or anger. However, meaningful adult intervention can help change the course of the behaviour. It helps to respond in a way that is calm, clear and accountable.1 Respond firmly, but without shamingShame can make children defensive, so comments like, “This behaviour is hurtful and must stop” are more constructive than attacks on their character. Explore what’s driving the behaviour.Get as full a picture as you can with questions like, “What was happening at the time?”, “What were you hoping would happen?”, “How do you think they felt?”, “What do you think needs to happen now?”Make it clear the behaviour isn’t acceptableFocus on what they did, not who they areAvoid labelling them as a ‘bully’Be clear about consequences and what needs to change2 Focus on change, not just punishmentWhere appropriate, adolescents need support to understand the impact of what they’ve done, put things right where possible and face consequences. That may involve apology, changed behaviour, school-based work or support from a counsellor or family professional.The aim is not only to stop the behaviour, but reduce the risk of it being the way your child relates to others.It helps to remember that harmful behaviour often has causes beneath it. None of this excuses bullying, but contributing factors could include:Difficulty managing anger or frustrationA desire for status, power or controlInsecurity or low self-worthPoor impulse controlExposure to aggression or humiliation elsewhereBeing bullied themselvesGaps in empathy or emotional regulation8 When to get more support It may be time to seek additional support quickly if there are concerns about immediate safety with:Ongoing school refusalSignificant withdrawal or isolationPanic, severe anxiety or persistent low moodSelf-harmSuicidal thoughts9Changes in eating, sleeping or daily functioningExpressions of hopelessness or ‘not wanting to be here’ What to remember Bullying is not a harmless rite of passage. It can affect a teenager’s mental health, self-image and sense of safety in deep ways. When adults respond with calm, compassion and clear action, young people can recover and rebuild their confidence.
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